RENT

I saw it. I watched it with about 200 high schoolers. That sucked. Gosh they’re annoying. Have you seen it? You probably won’t like it unless you did before it came out. I realized it’s not so much the actual story of RENT that I cling to, but more of what it represents as part of my life, part of my dreams, part of my spirituality (in a backwards kind of way), part of the way I see and understand the world, part of…… Nobody could possibly understand what I’m feeling. It has nothing to do with what I saw but everything to do with life. I kept telling myself I was really excited to see it- that it was going to be the best movie premiere of my life. But somehow I knew it wasn’t.. – ..and that I wasn’t. It’s like I’m feeling some kind of loss all over again. A feeling I’ve felt all too often in my life. And I’m also feeling thankful for what I have and who I am now. I’m just feeling so…… Nobody in the world could possibly understand what I’m feeling. I don’t understand it.

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